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Open Question: Extremely jealous of my friend?

Ok, I'm going to sound like a complete psycho but I don't really have many other places to turn for help so here goes.. I have a friend who I really do love and admire so much. We met in college and we have remained close since. In college, you could say I attracted alot of guys. I was quite shy and kept myself to myself but I got hit on alot. my friend was very popular as she has such an addictive personality. People loved to be around her. She's so cute and lots of fun. She never tried too hard and was naturally pretty. Not eye catchingly pretty,.. but more 'not bothered' pretty. When I was with her, I never realised quite alot of guys were actually attracted to her until I eventually spoke to a few guys who would then admit that they found her pretty 'hot'. This left me baffled as I personally didn't see it. As harsh as that sounds. Or shall I say,.. I wasnt aware of it until I was told. I think guys at that age were probably more obsessed with her boobs and bum,. as they are both huge. Her figure always has been amazing. But she also had a beautiful personality to go with it. So anyway,.. I then met my boyfriend through her. She was friends with him first she told me he had a crush on her. Me and this guy got talking and we then eventually began dating. they were from the same country and whenever the 3 of us were together the 2 of them would talk to eachother in their own language. It bothered me alot, but I never said anything. In conversation 1 day it I brought up the subject of him havning a crush on her, I guess u can say I'm an insecure person.. and it was something that was troubling me since she first told me. And the more I saw them together.. in my eyes clearly 'flirting',.. the more it got to me.He then told me that all his friends used to like her and the only reason he would have liked her before is that they were from the same country and he hadnt met me yet. Which I didn't buy at all. But none the less.. I was and am in love with this guy. My friend and I drifted a bit apart after college.. then we got back in contact and when we met up one day she had put on alot of weight.I couldnt help but hav a slight twang of happiness about that. It was obvious that she was feeling down about herself.She said to me one day that she felt ugly when shes with me, because of the attention I got from people. Regardless of her telling me this,.. I cudn't help but think.. 'if only you knew how jealous I am of you'. In my mind, she was still beautiful. She was 'perfect'. I'm not sure if deep down it was cos I knew my boyfriend had a huge crush on her which he just would not admit... which sent me even more crazy. It's a bit more complicated that this also... as my boyfriends parents hate me as I am black. This is the man I plan to spend the rest of my life with. The man I am deeply in love with.They under no circumstances will not permit him to go out with a black girl. They think I'm ugly,. disgusting and that he should find a girl from where he's from.He turns a blind eye to it all and insists that he will marry whoever he is inlove with.. regardless of whether or not the girl is green with purple spots. My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 and a half years now,.. and we have been through alot of crap. He is currently in prison and will be out in a year. But we're strong enough to get through this. Anyway,.. I am still very close with my friend. Only thing now is that she has changed COMPLETELY. She's lost all the weight.. and is a complete health freak and has a whole different, healthy lifestyle now. I'm not sure what's happened but she has gotten stunningly GORGEOUS. picture perfect. she is still very natural and effortless,.. but she's turned into this stunning,..sexy woman. She gets so much attention when we're out and unfortunately it's slightly changed her attitude. she's still cute n fun... still very traditional minded.. but she's loving it. In a way it's almost as if she rubs it in my face that she's hotter than I am now,The way she walks, talks and things she says. Like, 'When your boyfriend is out of prison we all should go away on holiday together,.. just chill on the beach and go swimming..' ..she knows i cant swim. and she is completely aware of how sexy her body is and now she's knows she's hottened up in the face department too. She knows she is way above me and it's almost as if she's saying,.. 'I can have your boyfriend if I want to. I'm everything he really wants. And I'm going to make your boyfriend think about me in his sleep.' ...I know ur all prob thinking this is all in my head.. but the thing is,.. my boyfriend still asks about her. I'm dreading the day he meets her after all these years and see's that she is even WAY hotter than before. n it'l b like a whole love at first sight kinda thing. more

Resolved Question: What do I do about this flirty married man?

There is this married physician who started hitting on me ever since he looked at my chest area. I'm a size c, but I don't even show my cleavage. When he flirted, I just ignored him, and so he got all cold with me.. I feel uncomfortable. Right now I can't avoid this situation because my mom had a stroke and he's her dr. I have a condition so my mom insisted he helped me too. Even though I said I don't want to get treatment right now, he insisted. Since my mom can't walk well, he comes to our place. I didn't tell my mom this because I don't want feel comfortable. What should I do?well, before he flirted, the way he treated me was normal and comfortable, but after the flirting (and me ignoring it) was uncomfortable and it hurt a little. more

Resolved Question: Would this behavior be typical or normal?

For a married man who is friends with a married woman? The situation is they became friends over the years through work (they don't work for the same company & in different states) and they talk mostly by email but have met once before, as friends. They talk about work stuff mostly, with some joking around. Sometimes, there's some flirting but nothing over the top. Anyway, if the guy returns her email when he is away on personal vacation with his family to say hi and let her know where he is and when he will be back in the office, is that typical or acceptable behavior in their friendship? Or should his wife be a bit concerned, as she didn't know about his friend? Do all husbands tell their wives about the female friends from work?? Thx. more

Open Question: Libra Men: Partners or Players?

I found this article sometime ago and i thought i'd share it. What are your views people? Experiences? Your signs thanks. :3 Libra is the sign of partnership and balance. People with several planets in Libra tend to be diplomatic, sociable and communicative. People who were born when the sun was in Libra, are idealistic, fair-minded and alternately intense and blase (all that balance makes them express both sides of the spectrum from time to time). Libra men and women are notorious flirts. Not so much because they adore attention, like Saggitarians, but because they are naturally sociable and flighty, they know how to flatter, and they move quickly from one thing to another, not liking to dig too deeply or become embroiled in nasty and empassioned disagreements. (This lasts until their solar progression moves into Scorpio, at which point they become incredibly stubborn and empassioned themselves, but that is the subject of a different article entirely.) Libra men are a breed unto themselves. They are the guys who dated every pretty girl in high school or college (or desperately wanted to), never managed to have their heart broken (or appeared that way anyway) and could charm the pants off of all their mothers at the same time. They manage to carefully navigate the fine line between being loving, yet mischevious, boyfriends without alienating their core group of guy friends, whose friendship they depend on both for companionship (they hate to be alone) and as a necessary backdrop to all their romantic overtures (otherwise they might appear foppish). This leads to two types of adult Libra men: the perfect partner and the incurable player. Most Libra men are on a lifelong quest for that perfect “other”. It is how they go about it that defines which group they fall into. Let’s analyze some well known examples. THE PLAYERS: America watched several years ago in absolute horror as C list musician Eric Benet, who had miraculously landed A list acress and beauty Leo Halle Berry, cheated on her publicly with random ex-girlfriends. Unfortunately the confused Libra player is prone to such behavior, loving the idea of monogamy, but unable to change his behavoir even after vows have been exhanged. The same horrid behavoir was shown by TV star Mario Lopez, when he was divorced by his wife of three weeks, Cancer Ali Landry (whom he had dated for six years), when she learned of his chronic unfaithfulness, including a daliance with a stripper days before their union. Some other legendary Hollywood lotharios have been Libra men. In the 1990s, seemingly not a single woman could rise to fame without finding herself in bed with flavor of the decade Eric Stoltz (Taurus Cher, Gemini Helen Hunt, Aries Robin Wright, Aquarius Bridget Fonda, et al) and Jeff Goldblum who has slept with everyone from Aquarius Geena Davis to Pisces Sharon Stone and Virgo Nicole Richie. The most famous present day Libra lothario is singer John Mayer whose list includes, deep breath, Leo Vanessa Carlton, Gemini Heidi Klum, Pisces Jennifer Love Hewitt, Cancer Jessica Simpson, Virgo Cameron Diaz and who boasted to Rolling Stone Magazine that he “slept with, like, three girls in a week” on tour. Only the indulgent Cancer man and lusty Aries lover can match the Libra man in number of conquests. THE PARTNERS: This is a different breed of Libra man. In the past few years Hollywood hotties like Scorpio Julia Roberts and Aquarius Jennifer Aniston have publicly coo-ed over their beautiful co-star Clive Owen, yet he remains happily married and has stated publicly his disgust with those who cave in to on-set flings. In the 1990s it would have been hard to imagine more obsessed-over teen heartthrobs than Kirk Cameron and Luke Perry, yet both of these men settled down immediately with relatively un-famous wives to start families rather than “indulge” in the millions of mall-rats who swooned over them. It still remains to be seen if their 2000s-era counterpart, young Libra Zac Efron, will fall into the parter or player category. Multi-talented icon Will Smith, is the poster-child for perfect Hollywood husband, doting constantly on his wife of ten years, Virgo Jada Pinkett and their two children, and refering to her as “the boss”. Tim Robbins has also been a loving partner to his lady of the past two decades, fellow Libra Susan Sarandon. And though Russell Simmons marriage to Taurus Kimora Lee Simmons has folded, he typifies the perfect partner, involving her in all aspects of their joint business Baby Phat. Sacha Baron Cohen is one of the most innovative and celebrated comedians of the past decade, yet rather than play the field he has avoided the spotlight and has been settled for the past five years with Aquarius fiancee Isla Fisher. And then there are the amazing Libra men that manage to pull of being both partners and players (both extremes again, I know). Matt Damon falls somewhere in between, as he dated around quite a lot in Hollywood, includinincluding famously dumping Aquarius Minnie Driver during an interview, before falling into happily-ever-after with his cocktail waitress wife. And Eminem’s love/hate relationship with his Capricorn wife Kim Mathers inspired some of the best-selling albums of the century as well as two well-intentioned attemps at matrimony. Michael Douglas has been married for most of his adult life but cheated shamelessly on his first wife, and only finally found true partnership, like many Libra men finally do, with a Libra woman, Catherine Zeta-Jones. Nick Cannon, looking for that perfect partner recently proposed to Aquarius model Selita Ebanks, but just as quickly called it off. Snoop Dog has been married to his high school sweetheart for more than a decade (brief splits have not stuck) while she tolerates him going so far as to star in naughty movies. Tommy Lee falls for hot chicks all the time, but like a true romantic always seems to want to marry them.Viggo Mortensen (who also has a reputation in real life) is the consumate on-screen film hunk who inspire women to cheat on their less romantic but more stable husbands. All this boils down to that old cliche about men and their relationship with their mothers and the way they were raised. The partnership-oriented Libra men were taught to respect women at an early age. Perhaps they grew up with a single mother or lots of sisters, but in either case they genuinely like and enjoy the company of women. They probably have quite healthy relationships with their mothers. Then there are the Libra players who grew into their Libra personalities in households that were less than ideal. They could have been perfectly happy homes but little Libra didn’t get much attention until he worked hard, or flattered everybody, for it. Or they were unhappy homes where he was forced to play peacemaker between a number of more aggressive types.In either case he took on the burden of keeping everyone happy all the time, and thus his womanizing becomes an extension of this behavoir, as juggling the needs of several people becomes fun and enjoyable. The truth is that even the player Libra men are desperately desiring that great relationship, it is just a matter of being realistic about their expectations. Libras have high expectations, in both internal and superficial arenas, to the point of being fussy and fault-finding in the extreme. The Chandler Bing character in “Friends”, so brilliantly played by Leo Matthew Perry, is a perfect Libra example, always dating around, always finding fault, as opposed to “no-strings-attached” Joey. It is only when the Libra man distills what he truly desires in a parter that he can narrow his range of vision and find his ideal, and as we have seen, this comes later for some than for others.Sorry, had to paste that. I had to post my question 5 times because of the link i added.I'm a Libra Sun, Rising, MoonThanks Braydz. Didn't want to have to paste that but the link made me post my question 5 times. :O I find this article to be really interesting, so i thought i'd share it with anyone bored enough to read it. :P more

Resolved Question: signs and their major turn ons....see if its right!!! Females!!?

Virgo female turnons include high-power creatives, rockers, painters, facial hair, business suits and bosses, bikers and skinheads, doggy style, tattoos and piercings, doctor/nurse, high leather boots, dungeons and goth. Virgo female embodies all that is enticing to men. The hour-glass form, the full breasts, the motherly doting nature, the ego stroking capability - Virgo female has all these essential elements that appeal to that most blatant brand of hetero male, having nary a desire to flirt with the sexual affections of any man who even slightly whiffs of ambiguity. There is something fetishistic about this forcefully feminine woman who turns her intent to please a man into a ritualistic experience that might include a drawer full of paraphernalia as well. Leather is typically part and parcel of attracting those motorcycle men for whom she will always have a particular weakness for. A zaftig female, she'll get down and dirty with a rugged bear of a man, thrilling with schoolgirl excitement at a rough rider with a Harley. Guys, grow a goatee, get some fresh ink, fire up that hog, put on the leathers, take her to see a rock-n-roll band and then bring her home and ask to see her tattoos - she'll be more than happy to don them for you in her birthday suit. Capricorn Female...She has a love of fantasy and covert sexual activity when it comes to sex specifically. This one digs the FedEx guy, the UPS guy, the pool boy - and she may fantasize over these service oriented men whose job it is to be polite - while doing her bidding. But the wise, aged Capricorn female realizes the importance of sex in her life and while she may be somewhat rigid about the matter - she becomes anything but frigid. Because sexual requirements don't top her list, she ends up with "hit or miss" in the love department. To the unmarried Capricorn woman, when this happens, if her man isn't cutting it, she may travel elsewhere. Her hearts in the right place but when she senses a void, she fills it. When this happens, enter the twenty-something boys that she'll notoriously plow through later in life. Men that are tireless, yet allow her to remain free of a marriage contract and there may be strings and strings of them if a Capricorn female has "taken off" in this manner. Men, if you're bobbing around aimlessly, consider reaching for the stars and grabbing a Capricorn female. It's a tall order to fill but you may find that if you're a worthy man she'll be your anchor. Capricorn female is ultimately a supporter of men. She's the supportive energy in a man's life - never one to suggest that he keep his day job. Leo females, in general, are loyal once they've entered into a committed relationship with their captured king, however, if he stops fanning those flames of admiration towards her - poof. She may place another gent into that bulls-eye target of hers and develop yet another infamously intense school-girl, goofball crush and be at it all over again. Leo females require the utmost of admiration from their man on a 24/7 basis. On the flip side, if a man can give her that kind of attention she craves, she'll be his and only his and her committedness towards him will be just as fiercely loyal as was the fierceness with which she pursued him. Leo females can be preoccupied with perfection and not one to admit their faults. They can also be dictorial towards other women and fall into cold and calculating attitudes. A Leo females keywords include power, will, drive, ferocity, drama, show, authority, shock, calculation, intensity, impulse and force. Pisces Female. She's not incredibly active in the sack and prefers to be plundered by men in some form or another as this fits into her "victim" mentality. She can be persuaded into darker matters in the boudoir, however only with someone she truly trusts. Her spouse or partner may be married to her for 20 years yet she'll still feel like a relative stranger to them. She never discusses her inner workings with her man, rather she'll spend most of her time listening to him talk about - well, himself. Life with a Pisces female is all about her man. In sex, she wants to be confronted with her lover's lust rather than a mutual expression of themselves as a whole. However, this desire to please her man really is a disguise to pleasing herself. The overindulgence a Pisces woman throws at her man is really her way of remaining detached and free from him. If everything is all about him - the argument can then never really be about her. Sextrology lists an Aries females turnons as swarthy looks, rugged types, younger men, body hair and beards, sex-on-the-side, blue collar types, big hands and forearms, one night stands and strangers. Her keywords are separation, independence, nonconformity, diplomacy, single-mindedness, strategy, feminism, libido, energy and execution. Sagittarius woman's tsorry it cut it off.... more

Resolved Question: is this married man flirting or does he just consider me a good friend?

I've worked with a 24 year old married man for a year now, but we've only been close for about 4 months. We talk everyday at work, sometimes having really long, deep conversations. He's told me things about his life that you don't just tell anyone. When we talk we look directly into each other's eyes and don't look away. I'v enoticed that sometimes his voice gets softer when he talks to me. We have this long standing joke about how he's gonna quit and become something else and I'm gonna be his manager and make commission off him. The other day when he left he put his hand on my shoulder and said (in his soft voice) "have a good night, see you tomorrow" His hand was on my shoulder for a good 5 seconds. Does this just sound like a good friend or someone who may be flirting?*I also met his mom, grandma, and sister when they came into work more

Voting Question: Iam a 42 year old man and I have been married for 20 years to the same woman...?

we have 2 kids and my office just hired this GORGEOUS 29 year old who could easily pass for 20...its unreal, she is smokin hot and she flirts with me all the time, I know she woudl date me in a heart beat, my wife on the other hand is pretty floppy and overweight and after 2 kids looks like a bag of beaten marshmellows, she doesnt upkeep her appearance at all...I am fighting the urge to sleep with this younger woman...HELP! more

Voting Question: Why have I attracted people into my life who have specific unesirable qualities?

Over the last 12 months, I've attracted 2 people with very significant roles in my life, who each have similar, undesirable qualities about them. One was my boss, who, after a year of working for her, started to become vindictive, litigious and downright delusional (thinking that the problems around here have nothing to do with her, when, in reality, she is the entire reason for all of the problems). She also may have begun to do some fraudulent things at work, but I can't swear to that. About 9 months ago, I started dating a wonderful man that I'd known for several years as a business associate and friend. Things started out very well and for the most part are still good, but his own fears and issues have been coming to the surface for the last 7 months. He is good about admitting that he knows he has a lot of baggage to work through, so I have to give him a lot of credit for that. He is a fantastically ethical and classy person who is the kind of man I'd want to be with forever. However, more recently, as he is trying to finalize his divorce from his crazy wife (which has been going on for nearly 2 years already), he seems to be lashing out at me and accusing me of things that are simply not true. The common theme between these two people is that both are projecting things. My former boss has developed a pattern of trying to make me feel like I've done something wrong, when I haven't. She says things in a very serious and accusatory manner, as though she's trying to scare me or exert some kind of control over me, presumably to feed her own ego or something. It's a mystery. Similarly, my boyfriend takes things that I do (like if a waiter at a restaurant is friendly or joking around with me and I respond in a friendly or cordial manner - not flirting, just smiling and cordial) and turns them into bigger issues such as "liking" or "inviting" attention from other men, when in reality, I don't even notice or think about that because I'm so focused on him. I'm wondering if anyone out there who might be a professional psychologist or otherwise have a background in psychology can share some insight into what could be going on inside of me that has caused me to attract people with these undesirable personality traits into my life. I'm a very nice person, I always assume the best in people, I'm positive, outgoing, ethical, and I like to enjoy life. I've never attracted these kinds of things into my life before. Other bits of information that might be helpful are: I'm 35 years old, and reasonably attractive. I'm fit and have done some modeling, and I get complimented a lot of my looks. I am going through my second divorce, after being married to two different men who were not honest or transparent with me and/or who were incredibly selfish. Both of them were very nice guys and there were good friendships there, but they missed the mark at being good husbands. Maybe that's another question - why did I attract two men like that? The current boyfriend has been COMPLETELY transparent with me, and is NOT selfish at all. He just has a lot of baggage that makes sense based on the crap he's been through in his life. Any insights would be greatly appreciated!! more

Resolved Question: Does it sound like this guy likes me? A Christian outlook especially please.?

I am pretty sure he is flirting with me at least. Let me give you a background of my life and what has happened so far with this guy. Background: Life: I have been raised under a strict upbringing similar to Amish/Mennonite way of life. We are a very Christian (non-denominational) family and my Mother has raised us to keep the races clean. So Caucasians with Caucasians, African American with African American and so on. However if you fall in love and marry someone of a different race, it is fine to marry; never have children though. If you were to have children you would be creating a mixed race, thereby changing the way God wanted His people to be. Now on a more personal note I am not racist and I am a very shy girl. My parents divorced when I was very young and I have been very sheltered from men, especially the good kind. I have been warned about the bad and have never been around younger men who might show interest in me. My Mother raised me like a boy, I am not a tom-boy, but I do not ask for help and am unusually strong for a girl. Background: Guy: I just got my first job (I'm nineteen) and I've made friends with all the employees I've encountered. I prayed that I would not make enemies and I haven't. Now I work with many Mexicans, and I have heard many tales of how they can be. My Mom and older sister have both had bad experiences with Mexicans and I was slightly nervous as I did not want the same type of trouble at all. So I again prayed about it, left it alone, and remembered that there is good and bad in every race of people. That same saying is still very true. Now there is this one Mexican who has been quite kind to me. None of the Mexicans have bothered me in any way (one of them calls me a word pronounced: Moe-Mee-Stah; whoever they are they say this when I do not see them.). He (the one I am trying to determine if he likes me) had asked me a few questions and one of the questions he asked stood out the most: Did I, or had I ever had a boyfriend? I was honest and told him no, I never have. I never felt the need to have a boyfriend. He seemed slightly disappointed when I told him I would probably leave this job in a year or so to attend college in a different state. Now several days have passed and we haven't seen each other much (as we only see each other when our schedules match out). He has greeted me as always, genuine smile and he says my name. Lately though he almost always puts a hand to my back when he gives the normal greeting. Not too low, not too highly set, like the movie Hitch mentioned: "Too high says 'I just want to be friends', too low says 'I just want to grab some a~~; you want to be right in the middle". When I had a bad day, mostly personal bad news, he was the only one who asked if I was okay. Today he bought some extra food because he wanted me to eat with him, I had to decline because I had already eaten, and he seemed disappointed. So the next time I passed by him I genuinely returned a smile because he had been very kind. Today he also helped me with a heavy object that I had to lift, and I can certainly lift it alone, but he helped anyway. I said thank you and he seemed unusually happy the rest of the day. I literally mean "he needs a sedative happy". Now it could very well be that he has just happened to have great news roll by whenever he see's me and I am just assuming otherwise. However if I am correct, could he actually like me? I don't take compliments well because I do not believe I am physically pleasing to the eye. I am a bit of a "self-hater". I thank God for how I am spiritually and physically ( as I am very athletic) but I do not become vain. I know the body is just a vessel and it does not last forever. So what I am really asking is: Does he genuinely like me or does he sound like a player? Thanks, Sheltered P.S: As I mentioned in the title, please only reply if you have some possibly helpful advice. If you are Christian, Mexican, or someone who has experienced this type of life living or lesson, please comment. I would prefer you to NOT comment if you only fixated on a small part or piece of this question for a tiny shred of amusement or for some reason to comment with no wisdom behind the reply. more

Resolved Question: What should my partner do in this situation?

My boyfriend is 2 hours away from home because he is doing a university course away from home as he cannot do it anywhere else. There is this woman that is married and has children, however, she cheats on her husband with men down at the academy. She has worked with my boyfriend a few times for study purposes and I have known everytime and my boyfriend is very opened with letting me know who he works with and what he does. My boyfriend just disclosed to me that this woman keep flirting with him and he does not know what to do about the situation. An example of the situation is: Once when he called me on the mobile and says " i love you" to me, she said "aw young love". Now every time she hears me on the phone with him and she is around she says "i love you" to my boyfriend to make me jealous. She also talks to my boyfriend on a social network site where she added him. My boyfriend thinks she is trying to make her husband jealous. Today, my boyfriend was on the phone with me and he was online at the same time and this same woman started talking to him and said "me and courntey saw you in class today and when you were acting like a sergent we were talking about how hot you looked" I told my boyfriend that he should have confronted her and set her straight and said he doesn't want anything to do with her in that way and that his girlfriend wouldnt like her talking to me like that. I do not know exactly what he should say to her so I was wondering if you could help me! What should my boyfriend do to make her understand he isnt interested? Am I over reacting? What would you do? I would appreciate your help! God bless. more

Voting Question: What should my boyfriend do in this situation?

Resolved Question: Do most European men get to be with different types of women mainly because of opportunity (Allan D answer)?

I remember reading an answer by Allan D about how he knows ugly Dutch guys married to beautiful women from South America. Then again I notice that Europeans travel quite a lot. Now we can blabber on and say media this and racist that but I have an uncle who is a Black man married to a Korean woman, my dad is Black and my mom is Japanese. My doctor is an Indian guy (you know, like from India) married to an extremely beautiful drop dead gorgeous Venezuelan Brunette, and has two kids with her (she still looks pretty after pregnancy). I notice that European men get to enjoy that because they get more opportunity to travel than Asian and other men and most of us Americans usually just travel in the US and rarely travel out. So lets say, hypothetically speaking, do you think that just guys of just about any race will have an easy time getting with pretty women from across the globe if they traveled more and tried to get with women of different races? My Doctor's wife (the one you read about earlier in this question) tells me that he had so many women trying to flirt with him when he was in Venezuela because he was a doctor and because he was an American. more

Resolved Question: Girlfriend is controlling, does it sound like she is?

I know I done wrong. I have lied several times and I flirted with a female friend on facebook. I know I done wrong and am doing what she says, she wanted me to delete all my female numbers which I have. I deleted my facebook account. She says I'm not allowed to have female friends. I also have a son which she does not accept. She never knew I had a son till 3 months into the relationship and I told her, she admitted she never would dated me in first place if she knew and she had said things before about not going out with older men as they have 'baggage' so that is why I was put of from telling her for so long, he lives hours away anyway but she refuses to talk about him which I'm fine with and she said before she doesn't want to be stuck with a person in her life who has nothing to do with her but I can tell this is a big problem for her as she is so young (21) and she keeps saying it be a big problem in the future if we get married. We have big arguments when she's drunk. She has accused me of being gay, seeing prostitute and being a pervert. All because I disagreed with her viewpoint of the subjects. She is apologetic but always worse when she is drunk. I do love her, I know I haven't helped matters but is it right she is so controlling? is this controlling behaviour? she just cant trust me. Anyway I can make it work.Meant, anyway can I make it work more

Resolved Question: Try this one out. (Long lost child)?

So many years ago while in the Army I had been flirting with this girl for weeks and one day are flirting went all the way. I was going on leave the next afternoon so I had about $1000.00 on me anyhow she spent the night . The next morning I got up took a shower got dressed and told her, OK lets get you home I will be back in a week I will see you then. I took her home and when I got back as I was getting ready to leave I could not find my leave money. I was going crazy. I called my friends i was meeting up with and they told me, just come down we got it, so I did. I had a blast that whole vacation, I was thinking yeah when i get back I am going to have a girlfriend I was super happy. Well when I got back my girl was gone, her best friend, dated one of my co workers so I asked what happened to my girl. Well he says you will never guess, she found like $1000.00 and went back to her home town. Anyhow about 3 weeks later she springs up again this time she starts to date a private in my company, my truck driver I was a Corporal at the time. Any how they get in a whirl wind romance and they got married after about a month of knowing one another, I never told him a thing, thinking he would only think I was jealous. So now we go down further about 6 months, we are right around the 9 months from the original date. I got a 3 day pass and was in Austin living it up. When I got back my supervisor comes up to me and says Corporal have you been having sex with this private wife, I was like hey Sargent they just got married, I dater her before him. So he says oh because they had this baby and it looks just like you. I was like what... I was getting transferred before the end of the week. Well anyhow before the week was over she came to pick up her husband one day and I say my daughter, once I saw her, i knew she was my daughter. I got moved and her husband well he was a dumb ass he was getting 86'd for smoking pot, and he did very shortly there after. So for the past 16 years i have been looking for this girl whose first name I knew but not much else. finally about 4 months ago out of total frustration I spent about 36 hours straight trying to find my kid. well I kept cross referencing her name with her husbands whole name on find people web sites. I finally got her maiden name but it did not stop there then i had to find the name of her second husband, then her third, finally I found the name of her fourth. Which after she divorced him she stayed with. So I looked her up got a phone number and called no answer. I looked her last name up on Facebook I got a picture but was not sure it has been 16 years and 20 to 36 you age LOL. I looked her up on Myspace and she had public pictures one was of her daughter my daughter I assumed it was the same name as I had been told. In that folder she had a picture of herself at the age she was when we had our fling. So I sent an e-mail and after about a month she replied, she was cordial that was about it, so another month passes and she gets drunk one night and messages me, she is off again and on again about if I am sure and what do I expect now and she raised her alone with no help from me and on and on. What could I say besides hey you took off I did not know a thing about you do you think I am sacred of my responsibilities I found you. She gave me her number when our chat was over and I called no answer, next week same thing again for about a month, finally last week I sent a text and she was like who is this and I told she was like oh hey. Well today I got a text and i did not know from who it was, it was my daughter. Her mom finally gave her my number. She text me and asked me why I did not call her, I told her look your a 16 year old kid you can't be having older men randomly calling you saying oh hi I am your daddy. I told I wanted her mother to tell her about me and give her space to deal with things she has raised her so she is the authority I figured. Well we chatted and it was not easy, 1) I do not want to bad mouth her mother what happened between us was between us, 2) I have been a single man forever, a wild one, and now my soon to be adult child is talking to me, I am not sure about the way parents and children talk. I was not allowed to watch her grow, too where she is I feel cheated but to hell with my feelings, I want to know my kid. 2 part question 1) I think I handled this as best I could, (don't come at me with fornicating religious ideals it is to late) How might you have handled it? 2) How do you talk to your child LOL? more

Resolved Question: Married man flirting with me. Help!?

There is a man at church who is married (I'm single) and he's always been VERY friendly with me, and his wife doesn't seem to mind. She and him both text and call me (separate phones) and she's said it's okay to text him and such. However, lately he's been really complimentary of me and even saying he's glad he's met me, I'd make a great girlfriend and that I'm beautiful. Lately when I see him, he hugs me tighter than usual people do at church and he stares at me a lot too. The days we talk on the phone, which isn't often, we text more than talk, he always says he can't talk or text the next day because he's busy and if I text him he doesn't reply. It's like he is playing a game or something. Although the attention is flattering, I have no desire to be "the other woman". How do I stop him from coming on to me yet keep the friendship? And why is he all attentive of me one day and then ignores me the next day? And the days we see each other at church, he doesn't text me at all unless I don't show up and then he's asking where I am. Help! more

Resolved Question: Should I give my man an ultimatum, marry me or leave? Or could he possibly be planning to ask me again?

Forgive my LONG story but I really need advice. I'm 38 years old and my man Scott is 31. For the past 13 years, I've been in a relationship with Scott. He was 18 and I was 25 when we got together. Prior, to meeting Scott, I was in a relationship with my high school sweetheart Edward with whom I have a son. My son is 21 years old now. Edward cheated on me left and right. I dealt with it for years until I met and fell in love with Scott. When Edward left, Scott moved in. Scott and I had 3 daughters together, born in 1999, 2001 and 2004. He also helped me raise my son when his father left. Between giving birth to Scott's kids, I worked my butt off, cleaned the house, cooked for him etc. I wanted to Scott to attend college and get an education, which he accomplished and I'm proud of him. Ever since then, Scott had an amazing job making lots of money. Things got rocky in 2007 when Scott proposed to me and then cowardly changed his mind a few weeks later. It broke my heart when he did that so we broke up for two months though we still lived together and raised our kids. Scott wanted to see other women and "test the waters". It hurt me but I agreed to it. That summer of 2007 while Scott and I were "broken up", I started sleeping with my son's best friend Jason(he was 18 and legal at the time). I fell for Jason and we dated throughout summer 2007. I stopped seeing Jason when I viewed his myspace page and saw all the young girls he was flirting with. I was mad at Jason then but in hindsight, he probably started seeing these other girls because he knew that I would eventually reconcile with Scott. So, by the end of the summer, Scott and I were back together. He didn't propose to me again but we stayed together. However, this January, I met a 22 year old bisexual girl named Regina. In the back of my mind, I was always curious about women I just never acted on it. Regina started having threesomes with me and Scott. That was always a fantasy Scott had like many other men at there....two women in the bed with him. But Regina and I fell for each other. Sometimes we made love without Scott being there. I was able to confide in her about how Scott hurt me and we became emotionally attached. But 2 months ago, Scott really started proving to me that he can be the man I want him to be. He started being more attentive and listening to me more and I got reminded of how much I really love this man. So last week, I told Regina that I just want to be friends and it broke her heart. I feel terrible for hurting her. It's been a week and she won't even speak to me. Its sad because I really cared about this girl. Scott appears happy that she's gone because he admitted that he was scared she would take me from him. Which was NEVER true because my heart belongs to Scott. Now that he's showing me all the things I want and need from him, do you think I should pressure him to marry me? Or does it sound like he might eventually do that? I'm damn near 40 years old, I'm ready to be happy and settled. I don't want to keep breaking other people's hearts behind Scott. Advice? more

Resolved Question: Should I give my man an ultimatum, marry me or leave? Or does he seem like he's going to ask me anyway?

Voting Question: Why do you think of my ex would reveal to his wife that we chat and still remains suggestive with me?

One of the downfalls of us being old flames, was that he was a pathological narcissist.He recently got married to his g.f that he has emotionally abused during the 9yrs they dated; either for flirting in her face (with me once) and serial cheating. well she is the wife now, but recently i was back in my hometown and he found my contact through my sister. He started stalking me on internet bcoz now he thinks i'm soo interesting after he didn't think I'll pick up the pieces and get married before he ever did. Okay to keep it short, he just told me during chat that his wife knows that we chat. I know for a fact that the wife has been very insecure about our shared past b4 they were married and I can't believe he would flaunt it in her face, especially that he didn't do it to confess and stop. He is very suggestive in our chat as if we are romantically involved (although not directly erotic). I really can't imagine why he would tell her as I don't see him one bit inspired to cut the ties from us. I believe he's doing it for self-worth and I remember how he used to make me feel unworthy and hurt. I can't believe the wife signed up for this for the long haul. He is boasting about being married and being changed man but I see all his character is still intact just the way i left him. I was simply enthusiastic to keep in touch (eg; internet chat) because I believed we could be amicable friends given our marital obligations between us.He is inevitably one special person /1st love whom i shared half my life with(from teen to early adulthood).I'm now 29 and he'll be 33. more

Resolved Question: Question about married men and morals?

I know a man (married) whom Ive been friends with for a years or so, I met him at mediation group- he comes alone..he seemed lovely - genuine- very spiritually aware(so I thought) We as a group go out to lunch every two weeks,,,singles,couple,solo married people...just a nice group.. lately he's been sort of flirting- he calls me and we chat but hes getting a little cheeky ...e.g you looked great the other night...why don't you wear those grey gym pants more often- it makes your butt look nice..bla bla bla Now- if he was single Im sure something would happen- we get along well-but he's married,and I would NEVER go there.... My question is- How does one man (or woman) say they are so in love with their spouse- claim to be happy and contenet within themselves and behave in such a manner... how can he really be happy- how can he really know himself- how can he accept his behaviour and not feel guilty...Am i the only fool who believes that real love,honour,trust is out there.. more

Resolved Question: My friend told me he was gay a month ago, however his girlfriend is still in the darkness?

About a month ago my friend told me he was gay. I thought he was joking because he has a girlfriend and has done for the last 2 years now. My reaction was to laugh and change the subject. He went on to tell me he was being serious and that he has been seeing a man. I had no idea what to say or how to react. But I replied by saying 'But you have a girlfriend!?' He told me that she doesn't know and that he isn't ready to tell her. A week later my friend decided to introduce me to his secret partner. Who turned out to be a 38 year old man who is married with children and who I just happen to know as he is a lecturer at my university. Feeling awkward I made up an excuse to leave and get out of there. The day after my friend turns up at my apartment and starts demanding that I don't tell his girlfriend. His girlfriend and I are also friends which makes this whole thing even worse. I can't believe the whole thing! It just seems way to coincidental that I am somehow linked to everyone involved! Furthermore I saw my friends new partner about 2 weeks ago when I was returning some books, and I have the feeling that he was flirting with me. And I'm not gay. He stroked my arm and I immediately told him that I have to leave and left in a rush. Now his girlfriend has just been telling me that she thinks my friend, her boyfriend is going to pop the question any day and she cannot wait! What the hell do I do? Is this all a joke?My age is 21, my friend is 22 and his girlfriend is also 21. My friend doesn't attend university at all, he is an office assistant. However his girlfriend is in university and is in one of my classes, but not this certain lecturers. I don't know if she actually knows this lecturer. more

Resolved Question: What am I doing wrong?

This may sound pretty pathetic, needy or desperate. But, I am trying to figure out what I could be doing wrong. I joined a dating site about 2 weeks ago and my membership will soon expire (on the 23rd of July) and I still haven't been able to communicate with anyone. I thought for sure if I went on a dating site where a person had to pay in order to participate that the men on this site would be "more interested" in meeting women rather than "playing games" like on the free sites. Every person I have "flirted" with, sent a "wink" to or "commented" on their profile has either ignored me or completely blocked me. Honestly I may not look like a super model, but I certainly don't look like the mutt next door either. I take decent care of myself, I'm intelligent (I think), I have a job, a car and nice life...just one part of my life is missing and that is someone to share it with. I don't think I am too picky. On my preferences I pretty much left it very broad to fit all types of personalities. I didn't limit the distance to my town only - instead I am willing to except communication from anywhere. I have a picture posted on the profile too so its not like I am hiding behind the mask of anonymity. I just want to know what I am doing wrong? My other friends that started using the same site at about the same time I did are already getting all kinds of matches. I've read their profiles and they don't say anything much different than mine. They were just themselves and so was I. I don't want to get married tomorrow, but I would like to meet someone who would like to "eventually" settle down. But, for the time being I wouldn't mind a decent conversation over a cup of coffee. .Am I asking too much here? Here's a copy of what I wrote on my "about me" section on the profile page. About Me: Hi! I'm S_____ (left my name off for YA only) and I enjoy the outdoors - I don't mind hiking or biking, heck I'll even go fishing! I'm not afraid to get my hands a little dirty. I grew up with a brother so I am well versed when it comes to 4-wheeling and NASCAR. I may not be the typical girly girl but I do enjoy getting all dolled up for a night on the town now and then. I'm not big into bars or night clubs, but don't mind a hang out off the beaten trail with a pool table and juke box. My ideal date would include a campfire and a starry night, good conversation and maybe a little cuddling. If your interested then lets get to know one another. Looking forward to some fun times. If you have any suggestions as to how I could improve my "about me" then please help me out. I am open to helpful suggestions. Thank you for reading this, I know it was long. more

Resolved Question: Expecting a child with her, but I'm in love with somebody else?

I'm only doing this because im having such a hard time making a decision. For the past ten years of my life, i've known and fell in love with this girl "Kerry". All through high school we were on and off...when we broke up one time, we each met somebody else and went off into relationships. Kery and I stopped talking when I went with "Amanda" and she went off with "Mark". We both went out with these people for nearly 3 years. She broke up with Mark in December of 2008, Amanda left me in Jan.of 09. We kept some of the same friends, so around April of 09 we met up at a party. It was almost like nothing has changed, we were both very happy, we started officially dating each other again that summer. We lasted til around Valentines day of this year. We couldn't find the time for each other in our schedules. She was in school and I was working two jobs. I was heartbroken and ran into Amanda one night who admitted how wrong she was to leave me, and how much she loves me. One thing turned into another and we had a one night stand.Amanda and I started seeing each other once in a while while Kerry and I didn't keep in touch really. Deep down I knew I missed Kerry, I wanted to just see her again and let her know how I felt and wanted to marry her. I went to break it off with Amanda for good, but before I had the chance Amanda told me she was pregnant and no matter what she wants to keep the baby. She started talking about how rough her life was growing up because her parents weren't together and she hopes we can stay together for good. I was in complete shock and couldn't tell her right than and there. A few weeks go by and Kerry called me with extra tickets to a baseball game, she told me how much she missed me, as well as I did the same. I didn't have the heart to tell her about the baby yet, I wanted to wait and see how things would pan out. I refuse to lead both of these girls on so I advoided Kerry a little bit until she calls up one night distraught about hearing the news about the baby. I have been being civil and trying to be the best man I can be to Amanda during this pregnancy. I agreed to go out to lunch with Kerry behind Amanda's back. Kerry and I shared the same feelings with each other, we want to stay together and get married. Of course, Kerry is upset about not being able to experience the gift of sharing our first child together, but she is willing to accept my future child. I'm so in love with Kerry, as she is with me. But Amanda is "in love" with me. I want to be there for my child, but Amanda probably won't let me she the baby if I stay with Kerry. I'm so beside myself. What should I do? I must also bring up that Amanda has moments where she loses her mind, I don't want to see her hurt my baby. She's crashed her car into my friend's girlfriend's car on purpose because Amanda felt she was flirting with me, which wasn't true (thats beside the point). Should I stay with Amanda and be unhappy? Or should I marry Kerry, and have a baby held over my head for the rest of my life. I can see Amanda being very strict and not let me even visit my child? more

Voting Question: I'm in love but is it with the right person?

Voting Question: I honestly doubt anybody will answer..but here goes nothing!?

This will be long, I'm warning you in advanced. Thanks to all who read through it & respond in a mature manner. If you have nothing to say, but rude things, take it elsewhere. I am 19 years old & have a huge crush on my best friend's married 42 year old father. First, let me say that my own father passed away when I was 8 years old & even though I have a step-dad, we're not close & never really have been (he's only been in my life 3 years anyway). I don't plan on ever being alone w/ my friend's father nor engaging in any sinful behavior. I have strong morals against even liking married men (bad experience in the past), but this one was hard to keep away from. What I like about him is I do find him sexually attractive & he's funny & very sweet. I can tell he cares about me in some way. However, he has done questionable things that have implied an attraction to me & he's at that period in his life where he could be experiencing a mid-life crisis. Around his family & such, he displays platonic-like behavior towards me. He'll IM me & tell me "good night" & refer to me as "daughter" (there is zero privacy in their house, so his family always is aware of what he is saying to me or actions he is displaying towards me via computer). He'll send me gifts & "love" on Facebook & "like" all my statuses, but he didn't start "liking" them until I started "liking" his. However, when we're around each other, he can't seem to keep his eyes off of me & I'm not exaggerating. He'll constantly stare, even when his family is doing other things, & he'll try to make eye contact w/ me & he'll smile. You're probably thinking "oh, he's just being friendly". My friend told me that before her parents met (her mom told her this story, obviously she wasn't born yet LOL), her dad used to stare at her mom all of the time & follow her & "stalk" her pretty much. For some reason, I don't doubt that for a moment. He also seems to get nervous whenever we're physically close to each other & he'll say random things to me (he's really quiet usually, so when he talks to me, it's pretty awkward) & he'll laugh at dumb things I say that aren't even that funny. He's also made an attempt at flirting w/ me a couple of times. I guess my question is, what do you think is going on & what should I do? And don't say "stop talking to him" because his family is like my family & I can't just push him away w/out explaination.Marco-Um, I SAID I wasn't going to pursue him. Clearly you skipped over everything I wrote, except for the part about him being my best friend's dad & married. Read everything before criticizing me. Also, no duh I don't want to be a homewrecker. I implied that in the post. more

Resolved Question: Interesting Situation, Help Ladies, What Should I Do?

Ok so I asked a question like this before, but now I have more information, so please read it all. Theres this girl I know. Me and her are really really close. I like her and we flirt alot. About two weeks ago, she drunk texted me, she said "You're cuuuuuuuuuute :) ". I was drunk that night as well while hanging out with some friends, and I told her that I don't think her boyfriend would like her flirting so much with a wink. she said she loved me first in a joking way. I told her then she should switch from him to me in a funny way. next day she said "Mark! You're Baaaad! hahahaha" Two days later she broke up with her boyfriend saying he treated her bad. We still flirt. I was her birthday party earlier while she was still with him, and her drunk brother who I barely know at all comes up to me and says "You should date my sister, do it man, you should." Now my brother knows her younger sister and they talk about us. My brother came up to me and said "you should date her." My friend has texted her before and told her to date me, and she told me this, and she jokes about us getting married. Which is usually a sign of only friends. Which is why I'm confused. We flirt every time we text, and whenever we're hanging out. Girls: Would you text a platonic guy friend you know well saying "Hey Cutie ;) " Would you sit on a guy friends lap and, how do i say this, rub your, you know, on his leg, moving around trying to get comfy. Would you rest your head on his chin and hold his hand very tightly at movies if he was just a friend? Would you even go alone with a guy friend to a movie and not consider it a date? And now the new Information. Even though she told me that her ex boyfriend should "Be lucky he can even imagine" dating her, she got back together with him. She invited me to a party on Canada Day. She said it was at her friends house so I could stay over. Now she still flirts and confesses to me i'm very good looking. Then later I'm laying on a bed after the party and she's laying there too, and laying in a way in which my arm is in between her legs, she's wearing short shorts so i obviously took notice to this. I was supposed to sleep on the couch beside the bed so when she said "time to get on the couch", I jokingly said "oh well I think there's enough room in this bed for 3". Instead of laughing and saying no, She looked serious and went and got me a pillow to sleep on the bed. But then her friend called the middle, so, I was kinda bummed about that. She was being very flrity and hitting me with the pillow over her friend. But then she talks to her friend, saying that her boyfriend texted her saying he went streaking and talking about him and everything. Why would she get back together with him? And a day later we're texting and I was joking about something and she told me that she takes things i say more serious than i think she does. Then she says she takes everything I say to heart, and i know it, and that i should take advantage of it. i said, "Advantage? ha well can I have an example ;) ". She said "You know what I mean!" How should I approach this situation? more

Resolved Question: Break it off...or get serious?

I'm at a crossroads deciding where I want to take my current "relationship". I know it's complicated and we probably didn't approach things the right way, but I'm involved now; so comments about not getting involved with a friend's ex or person who is not yet divorced are just not helpful. I need some perspective about where I currently am. At the moment I do not even know how to describe the guy - it started as a friends with benefits arrangement (with mild flirting for years before - we've always just clicked), but now we're starting to develop feelings for each other. When I see him we hang out, watch movies, have dinner together, etc before we move to the bedroom; so it's more than just a fwb situation but I still wouldn't call him my boyfriend. I told him he is free to date or sleep with other people, but neither of us feel the need to even though it's not officially exclusive between us. Simply doing what we're doing now is complicated, only one of our friends knows we're sort of seeing each other, because his ex still has feelings for him and their break up was a surprise to her, so for now we are being discreet. I'm quite sure if she knew what was happening she would no longer want to be friends with me even though I had nothing to do with their break up. He wants things to become more serious between us but I have reservations. Firstly he is not yet divorced, but they have been separated for 4 years. He won't go back to her because he has been dealing with her b/s for many years and despite several chances she hasn't changed and he wants to finally move on with his life. They were married very young and rushed into having kids because of her fertility issues, so he stayed as long as he did for his two boys. But I still would prefer that he takes that final step and divorce her before anything further happens with us. There is also the issue of our age difference. I am 25 and he is 37. I would like to have children one day but do not feel ready to be a mother just yet. Obviously if we were to have a baby the sooner the better it would be for him, but I don't want it to be something we would rush into when I'm not ready, at the same time I don't think it's fair for me to ask him to be the father of a new baby when he's approaching 40. It's definitely too early to be thinking about this now, but when I consider what our future would be like this would be a major issue. Although I'm obviously old enough to make my own choices I don't think my family would approve of a relationship with an older man (they would eventually get used to it as their first priority is for me to be happy). So there are plenty of reasons for me to break things off now before they become too serious and we have to deal with the fallout of taking our relationship into the open - but is this just the easy way out? Would I be throwing away something really good because I'm afraid of what we would still have to go through to be recognised as a couple? What if we go through all that only to break up a short time later? Would it be worth it? He makes me happy and treats me so well, I'm holding back at the moment but I really think I could love him if I let myself. I hate that it is all so complicated, but I'm afraid of what I could lose if I let him go. more

Resolved Question: If cheating is so normal and natural to people in marriage and in relationships, why does it hurt so much?

C'mon now, ya''ll. 75% of all marriages and relationships, people cheat right?? I dont trust men, and its hard for me to commit, cuz, (not to sound TOO ego centric)Ive never met a married man who didnt want to cheat on his wife or girlfriend with me, maybe Im wrong, maybe some were just flirting..... However I dont trust ANY man, as far as I can throw them. Why do I feel like this, why is the idea of my husband cheating on me so abhorent to me, if APPARENTLY, its so normal and natural, we as humans shouldnt really care right??? Damn emotions, I wish i was a machine more

Resolved Question: Christian men/women... How do you respect your spouse after infidelity?

I love my husband, I loved him even when I found out that he had cheated with 3 prostitutes... I was mad, but I forgave him after a few weeks. He was overseas with the military at the time, and away from me, so... not that that makes it better, but I can almost SLIGHTLY understand how he could do that to ease loneliness. However, during that time, I didn't cheat at all, I didn't even flirt with other men. I spent the time working out, and doing other things to make myself better for him when he got home. In fact, my husband is the only man I've ever even KISSED, so that makes it all the worse for me. Now, although I've forgiven him... I LOVE him MORE than any other person that I can ever imagine, but I can't bring myself to respect him. I respect my only ex-boyfriend more than I respect my husband right now. I don't love my ex, but I respect him and I know that he'll treat his wife right and never do that to her. He's a good Christian, and has good morals. My brothers also have my respect, as does my father (whose been married to my mother for 25+ years without such an incident) , as they're upright, moral men who have never done such a thing, and I could never imagine them doing such. I just can't respect my husband, I even have a hard time trusting him, although since he's been back... I know he hasn't done that again, and I'm pretty sure that he won't ever. I read in a book that respect is very important to men, in fact, the book said that they'd rather be respected than loved. I can give him ALL the love that I have, but I can't imagine how I can ever respect him again. How can I regain that? more

Resolved Question: How do you respect your husband when he has cheated on you?

Resolved Question: Is my boyfriend's sister sexually attracted to him? And if so, should I confront her?

My boyfriend is from the Middle East. I understand their culture is different and there family dynamic is different. However I have reason to believe that his sister is sexually attracted to him and threatened by my presence. We have been together over a year and a half. During this time, she has done progressively inappropriate things. It started with calling her brother while he was *with me* at night and telling him to come home or asking him where he is. This isn't really abnormal, just annoying. Then it progressed to her having almost a warning chat with me once about how she loves her brother more than anything and he loves her and she would do anything for him. I was like okay, that's sweet. I didn't really think too much of it at the time. She is 21, he is 23, and I am 24, just for reference. Next incident, she chastised me for questioning what he says on his facebook wall in their native language. He always translates for me, but once when I asked her, she accused me of spying on him. Next incident, no matter what situation we are in, she refuses to speak English in front of me. I understand they have a native language they speak with one another, but they both have a full grasp of the English language and I barely know 10 words in their language (although I am learning). My boyfriend agrees that speaking their language in front of me is rude, so he won't do it, but she insists on it. It's the same as whispering. You knowingly are excluding someone from your conversation. And when I smile and say, "What are you two talking about?" she says, "Nothing," and walks off. It is always my boyfriend who translates. Next incident, she works with my friends at a restaurant. She told one of my best friends that my friend would think that "her brother is hot." Even though they all know her brother is MY boyfriend...Seems like a stab in the back. The final and strangest incident of all - last night at a fireworks event with friends and family, she pulled my boyfriend aside. She began speaking to him in a high pitched sweet sexy baby voice with a flirty look in her eyes. She was stroking his forearm with her fingers. Then she crossed her wrists and took his hands in hers, gently stroking them...all the while murmuring these sweet nothings to him. She began to caress his arm and the took her finger and started stroking him across the chest and stomach. She leaned into him and looked up at him with a face that only a girlfriend would give to her boyfriend...or a wife to a husband. He was just laughing the whole time. He looked at me, and saw my huge fake smile and quickly walked over to me, sensing something was wrong. I immediately repeated her actions to him and asked if he thought that was sexy. He said yes, and I said, well it's exactly what your sister just did to you and it's ****** up. He said, "No, that's our culture. Brothers and sister are much closer." I said, "Maybe they are, but they don't act sexual towards each other like that." Apparently she has been like this her whole life, so he doesn't find it that odd...only when I point it out and repeat it does he notice it a little. My theory is, that in their country, women and men are not allowed to interact in public, no hand shaking, no walking down the street with your significant other, unless you're married....but family members can have all the public contact they want. It's human nature to flirt, so maybe she is yearning to flirt, but only feels comfortable doing it with her brother. I am always nice to her face, but if he wants me to love her like a sister, she needs to act like a sister. As long as she acts like competition, I'll think of her like competition. The reason I am asking this question is because I have told all these things to many of my friends, and they all agree it is exceedingly strange, even beyond the scope of a "different culture." But he says they are just on my side, because they are my friends, so I need an objective opinion on the matter. Do you think she is sexually attracted to her own brother? And should I confront her?I really appreciate all advice on both sides of this issue, btw. And no, they are not Arab, and do not speak Arabic. They are from one of the many other Middle Eastern countries. more

Resolved Question: Read And Help Please. Ladies Preferably.?

Ok so I asked a question like this before, but now I have more information, so please read it all. Theres this girl I know. Me and her are really really close. I like her and we flirt alot. About two weeks ago, she drunk texted me, she said "You're cuuuuuuuuuute :) ". I was drunk that night as well while hanging out with some friends, and I told her that I don't think her boyfriend would like her flirting so much with a wink. she said she loved me first in a joking way. I told her then she should switch from him to me in a funny way. next day she said "Mark! You're Baaaad! hahahaha" Two days later she broke up with her boyfriend saying he treated her bad. We still flirt. I was her birthday party earlier while she was still with him, and her drunk brother who I barely know at all comes up to me and says "You should date my sister, do it man, you should." Now my brother knows her younger sister and they talk about us. My brother came up to me and said "you should date her." My friend has texted her before and told her to date me, and she told me this, and she jokes about us getting married. Which is usually a sign of only friends. Which is why I'm confused. We flirt every time we text, and whenever we're hanging out. Girls: Would you text a platonic guy friend you know well saying "Hey Cutie ;) " Would you sit on a guy friends lap and, how do i say this, rub your, you know, on his leg, moving around trying to get comfy. Would you rest your head on his chin and hold his hand very tightly at movies if he was just a friend? Would you even go alone with a guy friend to a movie and not consider it a date? And now the new Information. Even though she told me that her ex boyfriend should "Be lucky he can even imagine" dating her, she got back together with him. She invited me to a party on Canada Day. Now she still flirts and confesses to me i'm very good looking. Then later I'm laying on a bed after the party and she's laying there too, and laying in a way in which my arm is in between her legs, she's wearing short shorts so i obviously took notice to this. But then she talks to her other friend, who's a girl, that her boyfriend texted her saying he went streaking and talking about him and everything. Why would she get back together with him? more

Resolved Question: Get serious...or break up?

I'm at a crossroads deciding where I want to take my current "relationship". I know it's complicated and we probably didn't approach things the right way, but I'm involved now; so comments about not getting involved with a friend's ex or person who is not yet divorced are just not helpful. I need some perspective about where I currently am. At the moment I do not even know how to describe the guy - it started as a friends with benefits arrangement (with mild flirting for years before - we've always just clicked), but now we're starting to develop feelings for each other. When I see him we hang out, watch movies, have dinner together, etc before we move to the bedroom; so it's more than just a fwb situation but I still wouldn't call him my boyfriend. I told him he is free to date or sleep with other people, but neither of us feel the need to even though it's not officially exclusive between us. Simply doing what we're doing now is complicated, only one of our friends knows we're sort of seeing each other, because his ex still has feelings for him and their break up was a surprise to her, so for now we are being discrete. I'm quite sure if she knew what was happening she would no longer want to be friends with me even though I had nothing to do with their break up. He wants things to become more serious between us but I have reservations. Firstly he is not yet divorced, but they have been separated for 4 years. He won't go back to her because he has been dealing with her b/s for many years and despite several chances she hasn't changed and he wants to finally move on with his life. They were married very young and rushed into having kids because of her fertility issues, so he stayed as long as he did for his two boys. But I still would prefer that he takes that final step and divorce her before anything further happens with us. There is also the issue of our age difference. I am 25 and he is 37. I would like to have children one day but do not feel ready to be a mother just yet. Obviously if we were to have a baby the sooner the better it would be for him, but I don't want it to be something we would rush into when I'm not ready, at the same time I don't think it's fair for me to ask him to be the father of a new baby when he's approaching 40. It's definitely too early to be thinking about this now, but when I consider what our future would be like this would be a major issue. Although I'm obviously old enough to make my own choices I don't think my family would approve of a relationship with an older man (they would eventually get used to it as their first priority is for me to be happy). So there are plenty of reasons for me to break things off now before they become too serious and we have to deal with the fallout of taking our relationship into the open - but is this just the easy way out? Would I be throwing away something really good because I'm afraid of what we would still have to go through to be recognised as a couple? What if we go through all that only to break up a short time later? Would it be worth it? He makes me happy and treats me so well, I'm holding back at the moment but I really think I could love him if I let myself. I hate that it is all so complicated, but I'm afraid of what I could lose if I let him go. more

Resolved Question: I told my friend another friend's secret - now she's gonna tell people?

ok well there's this friend - or girl - who is abit of an attention seeker. she has a bad reputation, and steals girl's boyfriends, sleeps with married men. she is known for making stuff up - like that she's pregnant when she's not, and other dramatic things just to get attention. alot of people don't like her, but we let her hang around with our group cause she had no one else. she would ditch us on nights out for boys. and she's not very appealing company. about a month ago she told me she was a lesbian and that she had a girlfriend. and i said that was ok, and that i wouldnt tell anyone! but i was annoyed cause i thought she was doing it for attention. which i later found out she was, as she slept with a string of boys that week. another friend found a guy she likes! they were really flirting all week. and he said he wanted to go out with her and kiss her whenever they met up on a certain night. she was soo excited for days beforehand - he told her to bring her friends. so i went and brought the girl with the bad reputation. the girl with the reputation ended up kissing this guy!! my friend was so upset, but pretended nothing had happened. this guy kissed alot of girls that night apparently. but this friend blames all on girl with bad reputation, and views her guy as a saint who was mislead. but i saw that he came onto her!! now this friend started telling this guy about this girl with the bad reputation. all her stories, even though they're true. just to scare him off her. so she can have him back. and the guy and the ggirl with the bad reputation aren't really going to get together anymore. but that was a few weeks ago. then tonight i had a girly night with the group (not the girl with the rep) and they were talking about her, and what she has done for attention and how insecure she is. and i said don't tell anyone, but she must be mixed up in her life and looking for more attention cause she actually came out to me as a lesbian a month ago. they were shocked, but laughed at how many guys she had got with. then friend said she must tell her guy this! and i said no don't it's a secret!! she goes no she wont tell. then i said promise me! but she wouldnt promise me. and wouldnt tell me why. then i told her, if you tell this guy, he'll tell her (cause theyre arguing) and she'll know i told!! then i'll be caught up in this whole argument! she'll lash out at me, hate emails, spreading stories!! but my friend wouldnt look at me, she would not prmise, and just resorted to saying i was annoying her. she's basically trying to impress this guy by telling him the story, and not caring what will happen to me! what do i do?? more

Resolved Question: i told my friend another friend's secret - now she's gonna tell people?

Resolved Question: Everyone wants me to date her? Ladies Opinion:?

Theres this girl I know. Me and her are really really close. I like her and we flirt alot. About two weeks ago, she drunk texted me, she said "You're cuuuuuuuuuute :) ". I was drunk that night as well while hanging out with some friends, and I told her that I don't think her boyfriend would like her flirting so much with a wink. she said she loved me first in a joking way. I told her then she should switch from him to me in a funny way. next day she said "Mark! You're Baaaad! hahahaha" Two days later she broke up with her boyfriend saying he treated her bad. We still flirt. I was her birthday party earlier while she was still with him, and her drunk brother who I barely know at all comes up to me and says "You should date my sister, do it man, you should." Now my brother knows her younger sister and they talk about us. My brother came up to me and said "you should date her." My friend has texted her before and told her to date me, and she told me this, and she jokes about us getting married. Which is usually a sign of only friends. Which is why I'm confused. We flirt every time we text, and whenever we're hanging out. Girls: Would you text a platonic guy friend you know well saying "Hey Cutie ;) " Would you sit on a guy friends lap and, how do i say this, rub your, you know, on his leg, moving around trying to get comfy. Would you rest your head on his chin and hold his hand very tightly at movies if he was just a friend? Would you even go alone with a guy friend to a movie and not consider it a date?Hmm. Ok. And by the way, I really like her. She wants to hang out on canada day. So I guess it's gonna go really well haha.OH HEY! By the way, She is usually the first to text me because I don't want to sound desperate. So she texts me like everyday. She hasn't texted me for a few days so I did and she texted right back. Is she not texting me because she feels like she is looking desperate? more

Voting Question: Can a marriage survive emotional infidelity?

Am I stupid to trust my wife again? I have been married with my wife for 17 years. About 2 1/2 years ago my my wife's phone received an sms. we both have the same phone so I checked it accidentaly. The message said "I miss you" I was shooked my world fell apart. even though she had not been able show me any efection at all for 5 years before I never expected this. I became worse when she told me that she had met a guy on the net who lives on the other side of the country and they had been flirting on the net recently. she cried and promised me that it was over she would never talk to him again etc. etc Then everything started to escalate, a couple of months later I found an old phone bill from 3 years before and I noticed that she had been texting and calling the same number often more than 20 or 30 times a day. I asked her about it at the time and she told me this was a female friend at work, I rand the number and a man answered I confronted her and she but to me that this was the same guy that texted her and infact she had been communicating with him for the previous 4 years!! Then she cried and promised this was all in the past. The a few months later I by accident when I was repairing here computer I found I a recent picture of this person. I confronted her, she cried promised it was all over. This was 18 months ago. Then 6 months ago I opened her bank statement and fond this guy sent her $100 she the told me that she let him money!! and this was a repayment, (so if $100 is a repayment I have no idea how much she lent him, or for what!) Now a month ago setup a fake facebook profile in my wifes name and sent it to y family, on the profile were naked erotic pictures of my wife. My wife is a very reserved person I could never imagine this from her. She then confessed that there were many many more photos out there much worse than this, she had been exchanging nude pictures with him for years, plus she admitted that last year twice she tried to meet him once she travelled across the country and the other time he came here. Both times I remember her buy new expensive lingerie. She had to go to his town for work, I when she came back she had new lingere, now she admits that she about the lingere here and took it with her. She also admits that she "was" in love with him. But she promises me she has never met him in person and never had sex with him. on the surface it sounds like I am an idiot for staying with her. ok so here is the problem I love my wife, in the past 2.5 years since I found he text we have had a great relationship. She has been very intimate with me I feel a bond with her. There is a chance that there are no more surprises and the relationship with this guy is actually over and we can grow old together. I can also see thing from her point of view, I know that things can escalate until they are out of control and I can understand her not telling me and risking our relationship. There is a chance that she has truly finished everything with this guy and we can grow old together in each others arms. there is a chance that she has never had sex with or met this guy in person. Why throw the baby out with the bath water? Right now I feel so close to her, so bonded with her. but at the same time I feel I have a responsibility to protect myself, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice (or five times) shame on me. I am not a jealous or suspicious husband, and I could even handle my wife have physical intimate contact with another guy, I cant handle the lies and betrayal. My wife has always been a quiet reserved person, she never had a lot of boyfriends growing up. we have been having a lot of sex lately, a couple of times a day. I am worried that this is deadening my instincts and I cannot make clear decisions. What should I do? I know this question is long and confusing here is a summary of the time line, Married 17 years ago She started the relationship with other guy 5 or six years ago originally confessed 2.5 years ago She say she broke away from him 6 months ago.Yes as she said to me in the begining of her relationship with this guy she was going through a pretty tough time and this person came along. So I can see why she entered into this and also she is my wife not my belonging. Se has a free will and the right to pursue love where she feels fit. I feel very close to her right now and the last 2 years we have had what felt like an amazing relationship. But on the other hand what type of relationship was it really when she was s in love with someone else she was will to risk it all? more

Voting Question: cant sleep at night...please help?

ok..me and my bf have been together for four years...one night we went to a party and he was sloppy drunk and starting talking to all these girls i didnt know and flirting with them with no regard to my feelings what so ever.. that night i broke up with him (about a month ago or so) and the next day he was hunting me down to try and appologize for what he did...well i "forgave" him in words but im not sure if i actually forgave him mentally..it really made me lose trust in him and i dont know how to get past it...i talked to my friend about this and she said that maybe we should take a "break" so i could take some time to take care of myself and not have to worry so much all the time about what hes doing or where he is or who hes talking to...but im a firm believer in your either together or your not theres no such thing as a break...on one hand this man says he wants to marry me someday and have kids but on the other hand i feel like i cant trust him anymore...even though this one time at this party was really the only time he really made me lose trust in him it still hurts...im not sure how to get past this and i could really use some help...some nights everything will be good and well laugh and have a good time and at night when i go to sleep i have dreams of him cheating on me or leaving me for someone who looks better then me..and ill wake up crying my eyes out and have to keep reminding myself it was a dream because it felt so real!...please help me i love my boyfriend to death and dont know what i would do if i lost him but you cant have a relationship without trust or one with jealousy involved...i was always a little jealous before but not anything like i get now...i need some help..anything is appreciated..thanks p.s ive always been self-concious of my weight and he has made comments to me about not gaining weight and ive gained 30lbs in four years so now i feel like a fat cow and that he would leave me for some skinny girl instead..(my own crazy mind driving me insane!!) HELP! more

Resolved Question: Am I just a flirt? And What to do?

I am 26 female, Major, Gemini and married. I have been told that I am very intelligent and bright and my acedemics proove it. I am good looking and impressive with a 5 '9" height and decent weight. I always end up with flirting within lmts when it comes to men. I can't control. And I impress up on them well. Doesn't mean I want to sleep with them or anything. My problem is this. I am terribly in love with my husband. But he is overweight. I communicated it to him in many ways and tried to encourage him by joining him but he sulks out in the middle and never goes back. Now, a word 'weight' would make him furious. He has a low motility rate and our baby making is also suffering. One other thing is that his being overweight is lowering my libido. I hope u know what I mean! My feelings are aroused when I see muscular heroes on TV and I feel that his obesity is the main cause of our unhappy u-know-what. I want a better *** life. I am not sure what to do now! Apart, I am quite attracted to an aquaintance who is single whom I come across occasionally. He doesn't reciprocate the same feelings, alright. But I have great respect for him. I want to befriend him in my inner heart and I am just under control as I don't want to end up in extra marital affair. My mind is slipping away.Why do I slip in like that?He simply doesn't care, guys. He says that he doesn't have time. He is 225 lbs! more

Resolved Question: Was in a 4 Year relationship and need advice.?

As the title says I am a 26 year old guy and I had my first girlfriend/relationship when I was 22. When we started going out together it was like your everyday new relationship where you meet her for the first time as we had been very good friends before it. I had really strong feelings for her and told her how I felt and she felt the same but after we started going together she said at the start she thought she had made a mistake but now she was was starting to get closer to me.Well during the course of are relationship we would have went out every weekend and i loved it but when she got up to dance it was very flirty like she would have done in the bedroom with me and when another guy came up to dance with her it was only when he makes his move to get off with her she tells him that she is seeing someone. Now i had no problems with her dancing with another guy but it was just the way in which she was doing it. So I started to stay in a lot more during the weekends because of this because you don't want to watch your girlfriend who you love flirting with other guys. When I confronted her about it she would go off on one saying how I am paranoid and i should trust her. Well cutting a long story short we broke up just a couple of months ago because her drinking was getting out of control she would consume up to 4 full bottles of wine to herself and any time I try to say do you think you have had enough she would again go off on one and i just had enough of it. So a couple of days I ended it she was sort of emotional but not once did she try to save it then a week later i started to feel like I made a bad mistake so I tried to get in contact with her to say how sorry I was and that I really want her back on my knees. Again cutting a long story eventually when she got in contact with me the first thing she tells me is she is going to a club she is happy now and wasn't for a long time and that she was too wild for me and I will find someone better. But I wanted her as I loved her but she had no interest in what I had to say and all I wanted was for her to stop the flirting and try to limit the amount she drank. What I need advice on is it been almost 2 months and I think I still have feelings/love her and every time I think of her I get really angry. I only have one friend in the world and he himself is now a married man with a child so I have nobody to go out for a drink with and all I can do is talk to him and his wife about it. But I don't want to be constantly depending on them either for support as its not fair on them to have to listen to me all the time.And I am quite a shy person so I wouldn't go to a bar/club on my own and I hate clubs because you can't even talk to anyone anyway because they can't hear you over the music. I don't know what to do with myself and even when I think about going out for a drive I don't know where to go what to do I am just so confused. And I feel like I will never meet anyone else that I am going to be alone again for another 22 years. Thanks for reading in advance and your advice. more

Resolved Question: Did something stupid, what can I do now?

My husband has a friend whom is an acquaintance of mine as well. I see him at the gym and he came by once with his gf who is his ex now.Last night we met at a bar(husband, him and I) then came back to the house. We were drinking and today I learned I blacked out. I apparently invited this guy int our bed to stay the night. I apparently was flirting with this guy and in general being verbally sexually suggestive with my husband but in a way that's inappropriate when married. The bad part isn't so much I was flirting with another man. My husband and I have talked about asking this man to do a 3some with us. Not something we are new at but apparently I was leading it in a poor way IF that's what I was doing. Sounds like I was but in a poor way. I really am not sure bc I cant remember. I remember earlier my husband was trying to lead a game of truth or dare and i messed it up with a dumb gay joke so it ended. I do not remember being inappropriate at all at any time. But I do know what the truth or dare bit wa supposed to lead to. Even though we both were leading at the same end result I know my apparent behavior crossed the line of respect to my husband even though I didn't do anything out there. Now, my husband is being really awesome about it even though I know Id be angry. I feel embarrassed to this guy because he doenst know me better than that. I know I blacked out but I cant understand why I didn't have a filter to know what not to say or do. Im embarrassed and feel horrible to my husband. I just dont know what I can do about it. Not to make it "okay" its ok, were not fighting and Ive expressed my deepest apologies. I cant get over how I could have allowed myself to be like that. I had only 3 drinks. This has never happened before and were NOT newlyweds.When I said inappropriate when married, I meant with others around.CoJo...he is upset about it, he is talking about it but just not fighting.Nora, no. My husband is straight, lol.Ive blacked out before. Mostly in recent months, my alcohol toleramnce has gone way down for some odd reason. My hsband has told me we had sex and sometimes I wouldnt remember. more

Resolved Question: I am dating a married man who just informed me that his is going to counseling with his wife?

We have worked together for about 4 years. Over this time we became best friends. I had a crush on him and he flirted back with me. I was dating someone and I started sharing my problems with him. His wife ended up confessing to him that she had an emotional affair with his close friend and he had a hard time forgiving her. A few months after the disclosure he left her. She did not want the serration but he was done with her. He told me he would never go back to that and that she hurt him very badly. We started seeing each other immediately. He started staying at my house the weekend that they separated. We became intimate about a month later. It was the best time of my life. He said he never had feelings like that before, even with his wife. He introduced his kids to mine, we had playdates during his days with the kids. He never told his wife about us since he said she was crazy and would take the kids from him. What he had was real and nothing Like I've ever experienced. he was my best friend and my boyfriend. Then one day out of the blue he tells me that he is going to counseling with his wife. I have not slept, eaten in a week. What should I do. He also never filed for divorce and I kept telling him that he should but he kept giving me lame excuses. I have never been on this side of the fence and I should have know better. My kids and I fell in love with him. they keep asking about him. What should l I do? everyone at work saw the attraction yet my family advised me against it. I am torn and heart broken. I want to tell his wife but then he will never talk to me. I love this man so much. Has anyone been in this situation before? I know how this all sounds but this is the sweetest man. I feel like I am loosing my best friend. I want to hear from people who have been in my shoes. I know it was wrong for us to fall in love but we did not intend to. How can he even go back to his cheating wife? I gave him my all, I feel like a fool but I love him and he loves me. more

Resolved Question: What do you do about extremely unwanted flirty neighbors?

This situation is not MINE..A dear friend of mine who happens to be my neighbor is in this predicament. She is a single mother of 3 and stands on her own two feet very well. She has lived at her house across from mine for 2 years. Recently her next door neighbor has begun to 'flirt' with her. One night she was sitting on the railing that connects her porch to his(houses are like row homes),and 'Jack' came up behind her and gently placed her hands behind her back and he pressed his whole front of him onto her back. And as she pulled away he kissed the top of her head. On another occasion 'Brad', who lives a couple houses down has started to make comments to my friend as well about dating and such........Hes a married man... My friend doesn't do ANYTHING to entice these men. She is a honest hard-working mom. She realizes that this can't get ugly because she can not afford to move and neither will they. So aside from going all insane on their asses, or just calling the police what else can she do??? Thanks<3<3 more

Resolved Question: A friend kissed my other friend's crush?? several times?

my friend told me about this new guy at her work. and she told me how well they got on. and my friend said they flirted like all the time. and they chatted over facebook and swapped numbers. they apparently had private late night conversations, and he said he really liked her! and he invited her out a night. and he was hinting that he wanted to get with her. and asked how she'd react and she said she wouldnt mind. and he said he couldn't wait. they were texting the whole lead up to the night. and she made me go with her shopping all the days beforehand. and she was so besotted and excited! she kept counting down the hours. he told her to bring her friends. there's this one 'friend' who's abit flirty, and slutty, she goes off with a lot of guys, sleeps with them, even though its clear theyre taking advantage. everytime we are out she would ditch us. other girls in the group dont really like her cause of this, but i thought there'd be no harm in inviting her out. my friend didn't tell any other friends in the group that she liked this guy she was meeting. but it was very obvious, everytime he texted shed get very excited. she was fixing her hair til the last minute. and when we arrived she was looking for him eagerly, and i kept going "ooh" after everytime they talked so the rest of the group had a pretty good idea there was something going on. then we were all heading out to the dancefloor, and the slutty girl just started kissing this guy and he kissed her back right in front of my friend!! i was so upset for her. she kept smiling the whole night though and acted like it didn't matter.the other people in our group realised too, and they were shocked. but do u think maybe she just didn't get it? the slutty girl did mention he was hot earlier, should i have said blankly, stay away from him? it wasn't even a mistake, cause she kept kissing him the whole night, and at the end of it, they swapped numbers. how is my friend going to face him at work?? another guy said that he kissed loads of other girls that night aswell, so is he a player? this slutty girl is known for stealing people's boyfriends, and has a pretty bad reputation, and even sleeps with married men. she doesn't seem to realise what she did, despite us not being able to look at her the rest of the night. argh, i'm just venting here, but what should my friend do? she says she'd still consider going out with him if he still offers! more

Resolved Question: Married - COUSIN keeps flirting...?

Married - Husbands cousin flirting too much? I am married & have been best friends w/ my husbands cousin who is a man. He and i are the same age & we often all do things together. Last weekend my best friend (husbands cousin) said that he loves me, im his best friend and that im gorgeous... i was flattered and thought nothing of it. 2 nights ago we were at a friends birthday party & we had a few drinks. While holding my hand he mentioned that he thinks i am flawless, a 10/10 and kissed my hand. He then told my husband that I am divorcing him and that he & i are getting married but said don't worry you can come. We were outside smoking when he just grabbed my boob, My husband saw but thought nothing of it because He is EXTREMELY shy the only reason he was taking to people was because he was drunk & because he is so inexperienced that hes not threatening & obviously because my husband trusts me.Now today everything is back to normal and he isn't flirting and barely talks to me... (this is his everyday personality) i don't know if he was just drunk & wasn't sure what he was doing or what. He has said that he would never do anything to ruin the friendship he has with my husband and i. what should i do? Thanks! btw we are in our early 20`s (please no rude comments on being married young, im already married and have been for awhile) Also::: Do you think he was drunk or do you think he seriously has feelings? i dont want to say anything if he was just too drunk realize how he was acting... Thanks more

Resolved Question: Should She Still Marry The Guy?

A woman was in a long distance relationship with a man for three years, she lived in England and he resides in America. The woman moved to America to be with the man. During the long distance relationship, the woman had the hots for someone who lived nearby. The woman couldn't help how she was feeling, and she slowly fell out of love with her boyfriend, they break up. The woman spends some time with the man she likes, her and the man spoke to one another on the phone every single day. They have only hooked up twice, never went out to the cinema or the restaurant. That woman sends him an anonymous valentine card, the man became flattered. The woman never kissed, slept or flirt with the man. She later realised what she did was wrong and went back to her ex boyfriend. Ever since, the woman never flirted with any other man, she realised she mad a terrible mistake. She has forgotten about the man and never made contact with him again. The woman's love between her and the boyfriend got stronger, he proposed to her and she accepted it. Should the woman still marry the fiancee as she realised she made a bad mistake? more

Voting Question: How can I find the name of a movie I saw a long time ago?

A young girl in Britain was sent by her parents to marry a man she didn't know. Took place possibly before or around WWII. The man was a widower with children and a farmer. The young wife becomes pregnant and has a son. She has a boyfriend/former lover who is an actor (I think) and she makes contact with him while out of town with a friend. She incurs the wrath of her husband for some reason. There is a scene in a town dance where she seems to be flirting with young men. more

Resolved Question: Do men respect women who turn them down or hate them?

My married co-worker wanted to talk to me at the park. I know what he wanted. I was surprised, because he is good friend. We flirted a little at work, but I am not promiscuous and he knows. I dress modest. I found out he also talked to other co-worker at the park last year. They kissed. I turned him down and ignore him like everyone on here said do. We work together 5 years. He think I'm beautiful and stare when hes around, but he doesn't come around now. He give me a nod in the halls and I ignore him. Does he hate me now or respect me? more

Resolved Question: Need your advise. thanks!?

This is about my sister who is 28 and this guy she has been talking to for the past almost three weeks, is 41. He met her at her work, they flirted back and forth for an hour when they first met. My sister couldn't get him out of her mind, according to her. She found him on facebook and emailed him. They have been talking though email since then, but he has not asked for her phone number, BUT comes in to see her at work one or two days out of the week and brings her coffee and cookies. He is a police officer. They are even making plans to do things together in the following months. I don't get it, am I missing something here with this guy and my sister? Men, how come he hasn't asked for her number yet? And NO he is not married, one of her friends she works with knows him. he even asked what kind of coffee and cookies she likes and brought them to her. Is he just an old school kind of guy and taking it on a friendship level right now? more

Resolved Question: Is there a way to tell someone to back off without being offensive?

My husband and I had been fighting lately because a man constantly tries to flirt with me. That man is actually my supervisor at work. In my opinion, as long as I am not encouraging it, there's nothing to worry about. But my husband has a different opinion about it. He told me told that I may not encourage my supervisor's approaches, but I'm not discouraging him either so because of that I'm giving that supervisor some kind of encouragement. I know he's right, but I'm not the kind who likes conflict, and as long as there's no harm done, I don't make a big fuss about it, but my husband wants me to file a sexual harassment against my supervisor, so I told my husband that if I do that, I might lose my job. Then he said he doesn't care if I lose my job and then the fight between my husband and I flares up even more. He told me I'm spineless and told me that if I don't do something about it, HE would do something about it. That's what I don't want to happen. So I'm wondering if there's a way I can tell that supervisor to back off (my supervisor knows I'm married) without offending him so I won't create any conflict and an oppressive environment for myself at the office? By the way, we don't have kids so everything we do is just save money for our old age.I don't have the luxury to quit my job... I don't have that option... more

Resolved Question: Should I tell her i don't agree with 1 night stands.?

I have a female friend 32, I am male 34, she recently divorced (2 years) and has just told me she is having an affair with a married man and although she would like to end it she cant because he is her soul mate. The status of their relationship is he calls her She cannot call him. They talk 4-5 times a week They only see each other 3-5 times a yr as they live in different states but work for the same company. I told her when she asked my opinion that she should end it and move on. Since telling me 3 months ago I have noticed that amongst friends the more she drinks the flirtier she is getting with guys in general. Sometimes even flirting with guys i know she has told me she cannot stand. It's almost like she is after a 1 night stand every weekend. I don't agree with this and it disappoints me to see a friend act this way, even though I told her she needs to move on and meet other guys. Our relatonship has deterioted as we no longer hang out or speak as often as we used to. Its like she no longer wants to see me and has started hangng out more with 2 other girlfriends (who she told me she can't tell them about her having an affair for fear of losing them as friends) instead of me. Should I say anything and how should I say it. more